hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
