toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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