nut hugger
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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