Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
