So drunk its hurt
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
