There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'm at about main and main street
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
