You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize