We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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