I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
