So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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