And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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