...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
