Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
