just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
