I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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