I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Randomize
