Me too!
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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