i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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