Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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