I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
