I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
