officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
and you fell through a lawn chair
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
