i was born a porn star she said
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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