Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
