Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Randomize
