i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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