some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
