Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
