It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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