i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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