That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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