the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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