Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
