I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
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