We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
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