She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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