Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
and she was petting her beer can
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
