let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i think my mom watched the whole time
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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