You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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