There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
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