dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
