even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
