but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
