help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
