I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
