that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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