belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
