The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
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