I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
