look no pants
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Girls should come with a carfax report
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize